When you are emotionally hurt and feel overwhelmed, you disconnect from the body. It is a safety mechanism to maintain some level of functioning; however, compromised that might be.
It also entails that emotional residue still ‘lives’ in the body, and the only way to start resolving post-traumatic stress is to release and integrate that high energy charge.
And this needs to be done with care.
Using the felt sense to come back into the body will activate and bring into awareness suppressed emotion and feeling, which may have been shut out for seemingly good reasons.
Hurt Vulnerability and the Need for Managing Boundaries
Most early life and childhood trauma is centered around trust that has been severely hurt and suppressed anger that hasn’t been allowed to be expressed just yet.
And this is vital in understanding the relationship between coming back into the body without going into overdrive, to re-negotiating healthy levels of vulnerability and managing boundaries.
It would need an initial allowing of vulnerability to feel again and simultaneously monitor and apply healthy boundaries; to decide what you can hold, and when it is good to let things rest and dig no further.
By re-learning what it is to open up, you are creating new possibilities, and through re-learning what it means to set boundaries, you can discern with clarity, when and with whom, you may open up.
And this is important cause you need both on board in a balanced way.
Coming Back to the Middle: Managing Healthy Boundaries and Vulnerability
Through using a robust cognitive framework and using the resources of your body, you can create a future of possibilities again within a sense of containment and with resilience.
And this is a process.
I am not promising it is easy. It is hard work but can be done.
What I like to know from you in the comments below is; how managing boundaries, or lack of, shows up for you.
It could swing to both extremes.
- You are overprotective of your private space.
- You tend to shut people out or lock your self up at home.
- You are snappy with others and cut them off, finding fault or being dismissive.
- You are too trusting of people in entering or staying in relationships, and unable to say no to others.
- Or you waver between some of the examples mentioned above.
What applies to you?